Mama said..

Lama betul tak writing kat blog ne. Maybe kene start menulis balik kat blog ne dan juga writing untuk FYP(speed rate writing untuk FYP seperti kura-kura)

Astonished I think that was the word to described me in the situation when my mom suddenly talk about me getting married. It was during our way to Terengganu, during our wait for the Friday prayer. My mom, my lil brother and I were sitting near an unopened stall. This is how it goes:

Mama : Hilman nanti kalo dah kahwin selalu ikut ur wife g shopping tau

Man: ...(tak terkata sebab tiba2 ja ckp sal wife) *angguk2 kepala

Mama: kadang2 perempuan ne kalo belanja tak terkawal.so at least ble ada lelaki leh la control ckit2.

Man: ...(dlm kepala:nape mama ckp sal bnd ne?,nak sruh aq kawin da ka?)

azan pun berkumandang

Man: Mama man g dulu ye(bergerak ke surau)

lebih kurang cam tu la conversation masa tu. masa on the way ke surau 

(dalam kepala: kene cari da la kot tp aku masih harap ada lagi chance ngan miss A lagi hmmm~)

tengah panjat jalan yg agak curam sikit lagi nak jatuh~

-the end-

'Have a Little Hope' (maaf jika post ini merapu)

                                                     In The Name of Allah; The most Gracious, The Most Merciful


As I was scanning around the room for ideas to write in this so called 'blog of hope'.My eye catches on one title of book which goes almost the same as the title for this post 'Have a Little Faith' by Mitch Albom, I only manged to read the book half way through maybe after the final I will try to finish it. Have a little hope even though the odds of realizing it is none. 

Mr Brightside is the term that I always see myself be each and every time i faced a situation when everything seems to fall apart. I always have this believe that everything is possible,as long as is Allah is by our side.If  the relation with Allah is kept at the best, InsyhaAllah anything that I believe will happen. Only in certain times, due to many other factors that believe of hope diminished and make me feel devastated to the extend of not believing there is still hope. Hm how should i put this into words? it's been a long while since i update my blog.so my writing skill might be gelong2 sikit.

Have a little hope,you know that the thought of her not being part of your life is just too devastating to the extend of feeling like dying.This are some of the points to remind myself that there will always a hope for me and her(Miss A) to be together;

1. I should be happy because i am her friend,i am her friend(dua kali I repeat kot).We gado2 (macam bunyi mknn je) from time to time but no matter what we still get back together. never lagi la da volcano erupt.kalo volcano erupt pun there always a way to re build the damaged house back.
2. Have a little hope there might be a chance that both of us might end up together. Mana la tahu boleh adjust2 a bit tibe2  ats pelamin aik?(senyum sampai dahi):saya percaya  that Cerita 'How i Met your mother' boleh diterima pakai dalam kehidupan harian.
3. She looks very cute when she does the kwiyomi. later must teach her how to do the kwiyomi ble kahwin sebelum tido suruh buat kwiyomi (amaran : khayalan melampau dan saya rasa nak picit pipi)man behave2 kamu tu separuh Melayu.haha
4. Mama saya nak cari orang Kedah gak hahaha.Miss A orang Kedah,Orang Kedah putih2 je tak tahu la makan apa diorang ne. 
5. :) agak merapu sudah.saya nak dia buat kwiyomi.haha~

Cantik betul gambar ne:)

Random stuffs:
-Hm.During this final week ,emotional well being really do play a role in answering the paper.saya pun answer macam lagu emo je kadang2.

-Picit pp tembam baru tau.haha

-boring2 lu pi tgk video kwiyomi, now i know that i really2 like seeing cute people(especially bila miss A buat Kwiyomi) hahaha

 -When I feel down, I makan.During makan time memang I happy.

P/s: hope we can still be friends.Nak makan baskin robin pulak lak la.ari rabu BR free kn kalo org tu pakai baju pink?

'The Girl from Kedah'

 

 In The Name of Allah; The most Gracious, The Most Merciful

Reading the title from the post,It occurs to me that this title might someday be a featured film through out the nation.haha.Catchy kot title ne ada Malaysian feel to it.If the late Yasmin Ahmad is still alive I might suggest this title to her for next big  movie; After my SPM I have this dream of being a film director Yasmin Ahmad's movies (Sepet, Mukshsin) really influence me on making the decision. I actually was torn between being in this art stream decision and also being in a safe sciences course, I finally end up taking Science based course for the sake of  a secure job. My parents actually were very supportive if i choose any of  the courses. As time goes by,(tic toc tic toc) I end up in UPM as an Environmental sciences student. One year lagi finish la bachelor saya, maybe after habis bachelor i  think nak debut film 'The Girl from Kedah'.haha marapu kerapu betul2 dah ne. Belajar Environment last2 jadi film director je.haha.

'The Girl from Kedah' nantikan di pawagam berhampiran anda..

Sinopsis;

..

...

.... kosong-kosong (gaya Najwa Latif)

MAYBE based on cerita hidup Miss A kot.minta izin tuan badan dulu ler.

(pas ne kne ambik kursus menulis skrip)

Pelakon: cari pelakon baru.tak mahu artis yang sedia ada mahal.lari budget.

P/s: 

Blog ini semakin super merapu and full of bahasa rojak.

Ini hanya angan2 si penulis,sile jagan bace seperti anda membaca journal untuk proposal FYP.

Tetapi Anda digalakan meletakan blog ini sebagai literature review di FYP anda juga.

The social network

 

Watching the social network with my mom and my two brothers gave me a glimpse of perception on what happen when a person is left by his girlfriend or someone that we once love. The story is actually based on the life of the creator of Facebook.I am not going to tell about the youngest millionaire that much, but more on how the movie social network portrays a success after someone was dumped when in a relationship.

It seems most likely success came after misery, the main character in the movie was frustrated when his girlfriend dumped him he then succeed in creating a social network which worth a million dollar. Is it success in making money is that important? for some of us we turn our focus on something else just to forget about something that we can not get. Considering the fact money is essential in our life, we do need money but the idea of money taking control in our life is just berserk.

When my relationship with her seems to be going downhill i try to focus on my study to the extend of really focusing in class.Alhamdullilah, my results seems to show improvement but is that all that i am chasing after for, a good results. I think about her je, dapat good results but still i think about her maybe i want to share my result with her kot(dia dah tahu pun).aish Miss A-Miss A dah dah lah duk dalam benak fikiran i.haha  for me in life success in this world is only for a while, what matter the most is the happy and joyful moment with the one that you really love and the life here after (hopefully Jannah la)

p/s: Take care;you might be having a hard time right now but i know you are going to get over it and insyhaAllah you will be a successful person in the near future. -to whom it may concerned-

     

MAMA wait ye

When I was in Kajang I saw this one disable guy with his mom eating at the food court.The disable guy looks old maybe around 30 something.What interest me the most about the scene is how his mom are willing to take care of him.It was a heartwarming feeling seeing the mom helps her child with the straw in order to ease the child. It makes me wonder how i treat my mom this days.

Since her retirement,my mom stayed at home.She keeps on washing the pillow case, chasing cats out of the house(i think we have 5 cats in house), She cooks and my second younger brother will help her(i ll help but once in a blue moon la). Two of her children is already in a university, i am one of them.Thus, left my mom and the youngest brother of my siblings.What I really like to say that she seems very lonely.Being the only girl in the house.

There might be part of her that really wants me to get married and find her a friend to talk to. But there is still also part of her that knows that getting married is a big responsibility and her eldest child must be prepared to face the responsibility. Mama misses the time of being able to talk like a girl,being able to be a girl.

Someday ill find myself a girl ye mama.As for the time being i still have to study and finish my degree.Only one more year mama.Wait ye,hope you can take a glimpse of your future in law before your last breath. I hope you can be a little bit more patience ye mama. :)

p/s: ~~~ dayu masa bergerak,tanpa menunggu seseorang insan pun.

Hang sedar la diri

Hang tak payah nak berharap sgt la man oi.
sedar la diri.
baling selipar karang baru taw.

Nape la hang duk tunggu cinta dia lagi
muka hang not bad pe (sumber:anonymous)
tayang sekali mungkn banyak sangkut kot.(termasuk juga Andartu & janda kaya)

Hang sedar la diri,dulu hg ada chance
hang tak p direct jmpe family dia(walaupn da jauh mai p kampung dia)
hahahaha
Hang sedar la diri

Tapi..

Aku sanggup tunggu..
sebab aku nak pgg janji aku kat dia
at least satu pun jadi

janji,
aku tak kan tinggalkan dia

Aku tau, muke aku cam Korea (sumber:tidak dikenal pasti)
tapi kecantikan luaran tiada makna bagi ku
Aku kenal dalaman dia
dan dalaman dia sangat indah ~~~~~~ giler

Mungkin peluang kedua akan dianugerahkan oleh Ilahi
Amin
Dan at last aku leh gak nak jadikan dia biniku sampai ke Jannah

Jika tidak
akan ku doakan kita dijodohkan di Syurga sana
In Sha Allah


p/s: Puisi ini mungkin ada kena mengena dengan cerita cinta seorang insan yang hambe kenal dan dia sekarang mengalami pressure simptom aka (P1V1=P2V2).Kitedoakankebhagiandiadanmissasampaijannahlahyeamin:)

As Long As She Is Happy

"Perlahan mimpi terasa mengganggu

Kucoba untuk terus menjauh
Perlahan hatiku terbelenggu

Kucoba untuk lanjutkan hidup"

PeterPan-Menghapusjejakmu

Life,somethings will not go as you plan and we started to think that we reached a dead end without a turning point.She is now happily back with the one that she must love.As long as she is happy, i am happy for her.I hope she will always be happy with him. Even though, knowing that she is with him and i am left alone,makes me want to run as far as possible from any scene from my past. Forgetting the past is hard to the extend of not hoping to love no want anymore. The past makes me hard to feel love, because being in love is scary i tell you.You heart starts to pump really hard, your body started to agitate all day long and every little things remind me of her.

She is happy now and Hilman you should too. Not every thing should be about you Hilman.It is alright to feel not worth it once in a while because you will tend to reflect the wrong doing of past. The problem is that my life seems empty like there is no purpose at all when she is not near me. Is not about you Hilman you should know.At least Try to make her happy.

Miss A you deserve to be happy.I will help you no matter what happen.Hm..My memories of being with you will always be part of me.

p/s:sorry for being so emotional.